Alongside the highly anticipated release of the final film in the Fifty Shades trilogy, Lovehoney have launched the last official product collection for the range with each item named after quotes from the films and books. There have been a number of ongoing debates regarding this series, it’s representation of a dominant/submissive relationship and it’s accuracy surrounding kinky sex but we must take the time to acknowledge that it’s opened up conversations in mainstream society about incorporating toys, bondage and fantasies into our bedrooms. Lovehoney’s official ranges have further encouraged people to try to try some of the things they’ve seen or read about for themselves and I can’t argue that this is a bad thing as long as it’s all being done with consent and safety precautions in place.
One of the most common starting points for beginners are clitoral vibrators and the Desire Blooms seemed perfect for fans of broader external sensations, so let’s find out whether that’s the case! It arrived in a black and purple box with rose gold detailing. A glossy product shot adorned the front whilst a product description and general overview of the key features took over the sides. Inside the box, I found the toy with the storage pouch, charging cable and user manual stored neatly underneath.
I assumed that it would be quick and easy to start the charging process but unfortunately it was the complete opposite of simple. I attempted to unscrew the cap to twist it off several times but nothing happened. It just wouldn’t budge. I tried everything I could think of and had no luck so I decided to wait for my partner to arrive a few days later and ask for his assistance. He almost reached the point of giving up too but luckily managed to get the cap off on his final attempt. It’s so simple to charge once the cap comes off but it’s secured so tightly upon arrival that it’s like a round of total wipeout trying to set it up for its initial use. If you have weak wrists, joint problems or tendonitis like me then this may be an issue and would be something to keep in mind before making a purchase.
When the cap is removed, the jack goes into the port inside the base of the vibrator and the usb into a suitable charging station. A constant red light appears during the charging process and turns green once complete. It takes around a hundred and fifty minutes to reach full battery and this is said to give ninety minutes of use time. Make sure the base is screwed back on firmly after charging or the vibrations will not work and the toy will no longer be completely waterproof.
Desire Blooms is made from a gorgeous purple silicone and finished with a rose gold plastic cap. The silicone is luxurious and feels very high quality, but the matte style finish causes quite a bit of drag and resistance. As a result I use a generous coating of water based lubricant each time it’s used to avoid any uncomfortable friction and I’d recommend others do the same. It is fully waterproof as briefly mentioned above so it can be rinsed with warm soapy water for cleaning or used in the bath or shower.
To get started press the singular button on the base twice in quick succession to remove the travel lock. You could also remove the lock by placing it on charge. It will buzz twice to indicate that it’s been locked or unlocked. To flick through the available functions continue to press until you reach the one that you want. There are ten to choose from, three of which are constant speeds and the remaining seven are patterns. There’s also a memory function so it will always start on the last setting used.
One thing that confuses me about the Desire Blooms is the order of the settings. It starts out on the highest intensity, then goes to medium, then low, before starting on the patterns. This seems to be a popular trend in recent toy designs but it doesn’t make much sense to me at all.
Many people like to start on low and build up to the high setting later so the fact that this toy does the opposite may put some people off. It only has the one button so you need to scroll through the highest to get to the lowest and if you miss the setting you want or decide to decrease the intensity later on, you have to scroll through all of the settings to find it again.
Personally I start out on high as I’m a power queen who likes her masturbation sessions to be fast and furious so the order of the settings doesn’t affect me directly but it’s a source of frustration for my partner and worth pointing out to people who need to go from low to high. I thought that the highest intensity was a bit buzzy and slightly numbing in the tip but not to the extent that it would put me off using the toy. The medium and low constant speeds are more on the rumbly spectrum. They both have some depth to them but the lowest setting in particular reaches all the right spots below the surface.
Whilst direct clitoral contact is my preference and easiest method of orgasm, I’m not opposed to broad sensations. It just takes me a little longer to reach the point of climax. I noticed that I could achieve both types of stimulation from this vibrator though which makes it perfect for any mood.
Pushing the tapered and pronounced tip into my clitoris gives me the precise contact that I need to push me over the edge in seconds. I do have to use lubricant so that the buzzing of the high-speed doesn’t numb me before it could happen but the overall outcome makes that detail insignificant to me. Broad stimulation is made possible by resting the surface against my labia and clitoral area for maximum impact. You can also use it for penis stimulation in the same ways. Place the tip against the head of the penis for precise sensations or lay the surface flat against the head for widespread vibrations.
I have had some great orgasms with the Desire Blooms during the past couple of months and have been left feeling satisfied and content after each session. I think that it’s shape is wonderful and it works well with my anatomy. It is actually more comfortable to hold and use than one of my all-time favourite clitoral vibrators, the Je Joue Mimi Soft, so I can see this toy making a name for itself in my regular rotation of reliable orgasm givers. The bullet vibrator from this range is my favourite out of these two purely because of my preferences for precision but I would not hesitate to recommend the Desire Blooms to power lovers, fans of broad stimulation and people who are looking for something outside of the traditional pebble shape.
Overall, I think this toy is a blessing. I wasn’t particularly impressed with the vibrators from the original Fifty Shades Collection but Lovehoney have taken all of the feedback on board and raised their standards with the ranges that followed. The Freed range consists of several powerful, quiet vibrators that are aesthetically pleasing and made in an absolutely gorgeous combination of colours. The Desire Blooms was almost the perfect finale for me and if it wasn’t for the order of the constant vibrations and so-stiff-I-almost-quit base then this product would have been receiving top marks.
You can purchase the Fifty Shades Freed Desire Blooms Clitoral Vibrator (£49.99) from Lovehoney.
We received this product free of charge in return for our honest review. All views are our own and based on our experiences. Some affiliate links have been used within this post.